Summary

Jessica Lahey is a teacher, writer, and mom. She writes about education, parenting, and child welfare for The Atlantic, Vermont Public Radio, and the New York Times and is the author of the New York Times bestselling book, The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed.

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What’s the best way to motivate students to own their education, learn deeply and durably, and develop resilience? Research has shown that the key to all these things is intrinsic motivation, or motivation that comes from within. Jessica discusses autonomy-supportive parenting and teaching, competence versus confidence, rewards, praise, and failure. How parents and educators can give children the support, love, connection and encouragement they need in order to stay motivated over the long term.

We also discuss the practice of writing. Many of the insights relate across disciplines and habits that will improve the quality of what we do and our life. A very insightful conversation.

Key Take Outs

• Writing and practicing your art.
• Habit techniques including accountability, goals and deadlines, discipline and practice.
• Pitching techniques. The art of rejection and desire to keep on going.
• Motivation to learn. Extrinsic vs intrinsic motivation.
• Over partenting and techniques to avoid over parenting.
• Modeling and thinking long-term not short-term.

Quick round questions

Do you have any routines and rituals that you believe contribute to your success?

Putting my butt in the chair – doing the work.

What advice would you give your 20-year-old self?

Be easier on myself find internal satisfaction with my pursuits.

What is the meaning of success?

Raising two children and being a great women role model.

What is your number one productivity advice?

Doing the work.

What advice would you give someone that needing/wanting to make change?

Favourite Food

Vietnamese food.

Favourite Leisure Activity

Hiking and walk-in the dog.

Favourite Book

A Prayer for Owen Meany: A Novel by John Irving

84, Charing Cross Road by by Helene Hanff

The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed by Jessica Lahey 

Favourite Quote

“I decided to make my life my argument.”

Do we all have a why?

Yes. What is my purpose to be here. Discovering that.

What does living with passion and purpose mean?

If you are lucky enough the work you do is the thing you love the most.

How to find Jessica Lahey

Visit her website here at Jessica Lahey

You can find her Podcast here – #AmWritting 

Further Reading and Resources 

TED Talks: Ideas worth spreading

Psychology Today: Psychology Today is devoted exclusively to everybody’s favourite subject – Ourselves

Life Hack: Tips for Life

Elite Daily: The Voice of Generation Y

Four Hour Work Week: How to escape the 9-5, live anywhere and join the new rich.

The Minimalists: How to pursue a minimalist lifestyle and be happier.

Mind Hacks: Tips and Tricks for Using Your Brain

Rich Roll: Plantpowered Wellness Advocate

The Art of Charm: Build confidence, feel comfortable and networking differently.

American Psychological Association: The largest scientific and professional organization of psychologists in the United State

The Art of Manliness: Encouraging men to be better husbands, fathers, brothers, citizens.

Tiny Buddha: Simple wisdom for complex lives.

Brain Pickings: An inventory of cross-disciplinary interestingness, spanning art, science, design, history, philosophy, and more.

Mind Body Green: Lifestyle media brand dedicated to inspiring you to live your best life.

Zen Habits: Find simplicity and mindfulness in life.

Creative NonFiction: “true stories well told.” 

Addicted 2 Success: Motivation & Inspiration Website full of quotes and inspiring articles for entrepreneurs.

Barking Up the Wrong Tree: science-based answers and expert insight on how to be awesome at life.

The Positivity Blog: Practical articles on happiness, self-esteem, productivity and social skills.