The Intelligent Heart: A Guide to the Compassionate Life by Dzigar Kongtrul and Joseph Waxman

There are few books I read as passionately as I did this one. It had me coming back enthusiastically to learn more. When I put it down, I couldn’t stop thinking about the learnings. With curiosity, I found myself in constant reflection on how the lessons applied to my life. If I could take these methods of mind training on board in practice, I wonder how much I could transform my life. As I read that last page I knew it would be a book I’d love to read again.

In this book, Dzigar Kongtrul shares practical insight into what he believes is the most profound teaching in traditional Tibetan Buddhism, tonglen. It is a Tibetan word that can be translated as “giving and taking” and is a meditation practice found in Tibetan Buddhism. In this book, Dzigar Kongtrul focuses on sharing lojong which is the practice of training the mind to be better able to practice Dharma.

Dharma is what in Buddhism is considered “cosmic law and order.” It also refers to the various teachings of Buddhism which as I understand in practice can assist anyone in purification, moral transformation and the path of Bodhicitta – “Enlightened-mind”, a mind that strives toward awakening, empathy, and compassion for the benefit of all sentient beings. Thank you, Wikipedia.

It is no wonder I loved this book so intensely. My passion is suffering and regret. In attempts to create lifestyles that dissolve these matters with the ultimate goal of moving towards pure happiness. I’ve selfishly set myself on this pursuit with a desire to escape my pains and sufferings. As I have continued in this pursuit, I discovered that much of my suffering is self-caused.

This self-caused suffering is the fundamental teaching in this book. When we exchange self for other by taking in another’s suffering and giving back our own compassion and happiness we can dissolve the focus on Self. Therefore in time reduce our self-induced suffering. In seeing our Self at work, we must observe the mind and develop awareness via mindfulness practice. In seeing, may we better understand?

The author gives many whole-hearted insights into understanding tonglen and then shares many thoughts, meditations and ideas in which we can use to diminish the self and in doing so transforming our suffering into seeds of virtue.

The author discusses the three poisons as a way for us to develop our awareness of and compassion for suffering experienced by other sentient beings. He explains that to best understand suffering we first must see how suffering results within our own life and with curiosity investigate the elements of suffering that we confront. How can we know and absorb the suffering of others if we cannot yet understand our own?

The three poisons are the cause of our suffering that I believe result from the needs of Self. These are attachment, aversion and stupidity or ignorance. He states that throughout our lives we will confront moments that are pleasant, unpleasant or neutral. Each of these has us conforming to the three poisons based on the emotions of the self.

We attach to what is pleasurable or crave and migrate towards what we think will be. We become agitated and aggressive in aversion towards those things that are unpleasant. And in neutrality we are without awareness, we don’t notice these things. As the author writes, “they are called the “three poisons” because they are the main manifestations of cherishing and protecting the small self.” The additional two are arrogance and jealousy, extensions of attachment and aggression respectively.

In reflection, I can see how these poisons affect my life. I can also understand why that in awareness we will be better able to practice the removal of them. As the author said, it is better to use our emotions that give way to the three poisons as manure instead of trying to bury them. When we hide them or disregard them, they either swell to the point of discomfort or have us act unfavourably towards happiness.

In allowing them into our field of awareness, we can use them to nourish the ‘moral’ soil, and that will assist us to build compassion, affection and tolerance. And furthermore, in practice, we can overcome the fear they cause in our lives. This, I guess, can only improve our ability to be with these emotions moving forward. When we understand our suffering and its causes we are better able to exchange self for other.

In summary, I’d just say this is an amazingly insightful read. As a student and teacher of suffering, the more I learn, the more I realise that the Self and the poisons as illustrated above are considerable players in living a life of misery. And a majority of our self-caused suffering can be overcome if we continue to develop our awareness.

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If this book sounds of interest you can purchase The Intelligent Heart: A Guide to the Compassionate Life here.

Please leave your thoughts, comments & questions below.

Peace, passion and purpose…

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