Escape Self-Absorption, Let Go of The Ego
Written by Leigh Martinuzzi
We can have everything we want in life by escaping our self-absorption. Everything! It is not that we should deny self-care or self-love. We shouldn’t seek to abandon our search and satisfaction of our primary human needs – food, shelter, belongingness, survival. Self-absorption is allowing the ego to rule and letting it obsess over fulfilling false needs.
The ego attaches itself to trivial matters. It cares not of others or even one’s personal well-being. It concerns itself with misleading ideas on how to protect one’s self-interests and uphold some kind of desirable identity. It does it in ways that are often inconsiderate, lacking compassion and of little long-term purpose. The ego is short-term focused.
I believe self-absorption doesn’t develop into any higher state of purpose. It brings not fulfilment, freedom and happiness. And in my personal experience, as I continue to focus on escaping my self-absorption, it only creates more suffering in life. To flee it, to let go, we must understand it and do that need to bring our attention and awareness to it.
In the past whenever I have chased money I have found myself more stressed and unhappier in the pursuit. It’s an example that has frequently occurred in my life and one that I am happy to share because I am sure many can relate. In reflection, I have found that in these moments of my life I have realised I’ve been misguided by my unthoughtful self-interests.
Money is how the world economies work. It is an important element of upholding a basic standard of living. It’s a “necessary evil” although I don’t think it’s evil at all. However, sometimes the greedy desire for more money leads us to a state of being that is anything but desirable. The ego disregards the how, what, where and why of getting what it wants.
One may ask, but how is this considered self-absorption? Is it not money we need to uphold our basic needs – food, shelter and clothing? Isn’t it fair to earn a living to protect our families and support our children’s development? I would answer, yes, absolutely it is. I’d then ask, how much is necessary? What is necessary? And why?
Does it serve a purpose more significant than the satisfaction of one’s short-term interests and desires? Does it have the potential to move us beyond our self-absorption?
What is it in our lives that makes us crave more? Is it to give our families more clothing, food, and shelter? Do we not now take out larger mortgages to build bigger houses, so we can store more stuff that we continually consume?
Are our bellies not full and bloated from the over-consumption of foods that do us little benefits for our health? Isn’t there an obesity epidemic? And is what we are doing to earn a living truly bringing us a higher level of happiness? Is how we are living our lives truly satisfying? If so, why are we more addicted and over medicated than before at any other time in history?
Self-absorption, individualism, self-centred societies, unhealthy competition, a lacking purpose – these matters are not freeing, they are binding. We must escape our self-absorption and let go of the ego. And yet, where do we begin. Most of us would deny any such accusations. I still do. However, I am aware. And the more I take notice of such self-centred behaviours, the more I see the unessential, the better I am able to let go.
Chase what you will. Crave things until it hurts no more. Desire, pray, wish and dream. Seek out what you must. Don’t give up on the pursuit of understanding. A search for greater meaning. And while doing these activities necessary or not, wholesome or unwholesome, ego-driven, or purpose driven, ask yourself – what is it all for?
When the answers find a purpose beyond one’s self-absorbed short-term interests know then that you may be on the right path or perhaps just a better path.
Leave your thoughts, comments and questions below. Reach out directly by email of social media. Peace, Passion & Purpose.
Further Reading and Resources
TED Talks: Ideas worth spreading
Elite Daily: The Voice of Generation Y
Four Hour Work Week: How to escape the 9-5, live anywhere and join the new rich.
The Minimalists: How to pursue a minimalist lifestyle and be happier.
Mind Hacks: Tips and Tricks for Using Your Brain
Rich Roll: Plantpowered Wellness Advocate
The Art of Charm: Build confidence, feel comfortable and networking differently.
The Art of Manliness: Encouraging men to be better husbands, fathers, brothers, citizens.
Tiny Buddha: Simple wisdom for complex lives.
Mind Body Green: Lifestyle media brand dedicated to inspiring you to live your best life.
Zen Habits: Find simplicity and mindfulness in life.
Creative NonFiction: “true stories well told.”
Barking Up the Wrong Tree: science-based answers and expert insight on how to be awesome at life.
The Positivity Blog: Practical articles on happiness, self-esteem, productivity and social skills.
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